love is all there is...

Today my kitten gets her stitches out. I was supposed to take her yesterday, but yesterday was a fairly miserable day for me so I am taking her today. I have so much to do today! I applied for unemployment. I hate to do it, because I feel like a bum, but work just isn't coming my way. I have been looking, though.

I miss my ex boyfriend, Jimmy. I haven't written about him here before really, because I was trying to forget him. But I love him still. I don't know that I can ever stop loving him. I hope he is doing ok in coping with his cancer. I pray he has finally attained sobriety and the peace of mind his beautiful heart so deserves. God I miss him. Things between us were so wild and crazy though. If only we hadn't been so far gone on drugs...

Alas, what if's will get me nowhere eh? Snap back to reality, Jodee!

I found two new boards that I like, but I haven't decided which to make a permanent home of so I am visiting both. There are TF'ers at both sites, which is nice, but I am sort of non existant to them I think. But it is ok. I do not need to be the centre of attention, alas. I am the center of my own world, and that is good enough. I am all I need.

Well, I didn't do so well food wise yesterday. Lots of binging and purging, and then I decided to keep some down because I was feeling so very ill. I do feel better today, and am not having a problem with my restriction at all. I am trying to quit smoking also, and have only had 1 smoke today. Not bad :)

It is almost time to take Mist Spryte to the vet's office so I better run. Stinky cheese has to drive me because my car is being a mess. First the brakes, then the oil, now the tires that I just replaced a couple months ago. Does it never end?

I can't wait to get my taxes back. A true test of my will to stay sober, as I really want to get high now... and I will have 500 bucks very very soon. Can I do it? Can I fight the demons in my head? Do I even want to? Alas, I do not know...