love is all there is...

Anthony got mom to consider letting me stay with her til mid February, when I plan to get an apartment with David. I can't wait for that to happen.

I really don't want to have sex with Robert. Luckily he didn't even ask last night.

I was feeling very depressed when I woke up, but then I thought about Anthony and how hard he is trying to help me, and then David and his optimism... and I feel ok.

I guess I don't hate my mother...

She is just so stubborn and sometimes it seems like she has no heart. But I imagine she has one somewhere. Maybe she just doesn't know how to love someone right. Or maybe she doesn't know how to show it.

I know one thing. I really need to be more careful with my account. I guess I won't leave it up anymore when I am sleeping. This is getting ridiculous. I have had it paid for 2 times now and twice it has been cancelled.

I emailed customer service.. I will see what they say later.

Shit maybe I will just leave it off, although it is my only real contact with the outside world.. as I have no phone, no way to talk to anyone at all...and it will make me sad to not be able to log on and talk to my friends...

I think Robert is doing it on purpose. I think he doesn't like me playing for some reason, even though he plays. Maybe he isn't doing it. Or maybe he's conspiring to isolate me...

But life keeps smacking me in the face, so what can I expect I guess.

But I will make it.

Indiana Jones remember..